Like Broken Glass

Lately I have been tired. And emotionally sore. I feel like at thin piece of ice on the pond in the morning, ready to shatter at a glance.  The patterns and crystals are the weakness in the mix but they are the things that make the ice what it is. I find that at times like this I need to stay as far away from people as possible because I read too much into everything. As well, by nature, people are cruel.  For every person you meet will sooner tear you down to make you feel like dirt just for the sake of doing it.  If you do not believe me, ask yourself the question: “How many compliments have I received in the past 3 days?” The ask yourself: “How many criticisms and insults have I received over the past 3 days?” More often than not – the answer to the second question is higher that the answer to the first question.  It appears to me that a larger portion of us try to feel better about ourselves by tearing everyone else down around us.

I used to socialize with a group of people like that – until one day I came to realize that after being with them for any length of time I would come home more depressed than when I left. That is when I began to realize that these people in particular could only feel good about themselves when they were criticizing others or making fun of  people. Quite sad, really.

That is when I got into the habit of stepping away from everyone when I am feeling fragile.  I do not need the grief and I do not need to be the brunt of everyone’s jokes.